Tuesday, September 29, 2009

My Shooting Star

Shooting Star
There once was a shooting star that was falling from the sky. It landed right on the school. The next day they had of canceled school because of the star. When the cops got to the school, they had of started to investigate it. It suddenly opened up! The cops all got there weapons ready to shot whatever came out of the star.
Suddenly something started coming out. It was something gray. Everybody gasped as the mysterious creature was walking out of the star. It put out its hand and everyone stood still and one cop shot at the creature, but nothing happened to it. Then every cop that was there started firing their weapons.
The creature had felt nothing until someone threw a gas bomb at the mysterious creature. Then it hit them its no creature it’s an alien.
The alien started shooting laser beams from his hands, and destroyed all the buildings around him.
Everyone started to hear a weird noise. They looked up and all they could see were a lot of falling stars. All the people started to look for shelter, but no one found any because all the buildings were destroyed.
When the aliens landed they destroyed the entire world and there were no survivors.
By: Jose Rocha

21 comments:

Wm Chamberlain said...

First, you used some excellent descriptive words such as gasped and mysterious. Second, you should have read your story out loud and that could help you with your story's flow. Finally, that was pretty depressing.

Nathaniel said...

Death by stars? That would be a bad way to go wouldn't it. But it was still a pretty good story and even a little funny so good job

Unknown said...

Your story was awesome.

Alexis said...

I thought that the story was cool. Especially when the alien was invincible.Good work Jose.

Unknown said...

I liked the the way you described the way the alien came out and destroyed the buildings

Unknown said...

A.J my friend old pal why couldn't I have lived.

Unknown said...

Hey.. Jose
I like your story its pretty good. Nice Job!!;)

Harichy said...

nice man. pretty cool and funny.u should of added things like the alien blew the popos head off.

!~Y@2m!n~! said...

I liked your story it was very interesting

yazmin said...

I liked your story very much.

Sandra Ocampo said...

Wow!! That was an excellent story way to go keep up the goods work.

Amouze said...

Nice description, and also it was funny and cool keep writing!!!

jacob said...

That story was way better than mine. I actually felt like I was in the story. I like the blog and hope that you visit my blob.

Jose said...

I like your story it was cool specially the part when the aliens came out.

Dale said...

I like the story. It is cool how the kids got the school day off.

Eduardo Mata said...

I really liked the story that you wrote. I also liked the way that you described the details.

Ana said...

No way Jose! That was great story. Good job! And i like the title of your story!

Unknown said...

cool story sudden ending its cool though becuz their is death in it lol

Kate said...

Hi A.J. I am a student in Dr. Strange's class at south alabama! Your story was very creative. It was action packed and kept me on the edge of my seat. Good job!

Melissa Russell's EDM310 Blog said...

Hi A.J. I am a student in Dr. Strange's class at the University of South Alabama. I enjoyed your story. You have a great imagination! Keep up the good work.

Rachel said...

I am a student at the University of South Alabama in Dr. Strange's EDM310 class. Your story was very descriptive and entertaining. I also really enjoyed looking around your blog and learning about some new things like voice threads. Keep up the great work!